Meg Meets Wisdom, Wisdom That Can be a Real B-word

I have a big mouth, at least in the dentistry world. So large, that I have room for all of my wisdom teeth to just slide on in. This is great because oral surgery is expensive, so if I have room for the teeth, I avoid the costs, the surgery and the whole chipmunk face thing.

No one likes looking like a chipmunk.

But at least all the wisdom-toothless are hopped up on drugs so they can sleep through the pain and swollen face phase. The rest of us, the ones who have huge mouths, we have to go through the pain of teething all over again.

Screw that.

primary-teeth-teethingringI have a new respect for babies. Teething is a real bitch. At the ripe old age of 22, it is not socially acceptable to use a teething ring. Instead, you have to find the nearest pharmacy and buy some Orajel and apply that to your gums and mouth like some old person and wallow in self-pity like an adult. Wisdom teeth are like your body’s way of saying, “hey you’re an adult but I’m going to make you cry like you’re a teething 2 year old.” So rude.

The next time you’re around some poor teething child, give them a fist-bump from me. Mad respect teethers, mad respect.

+Meggan Fallon


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